Doesn't this sounds like it's from some secular motivation course you've paid thousands of dollars for? (and now reading for free) hehehe :)
Indeed, to change our being, we have to change our believes but how do we do that?
Firstly, I belief, as a christian, that the best changer of believes is God. While I do feel that there are many examples in the bible depicting such processes... some that comes to mind immediately are convertions in acts, apostles paul...etc but I'm not sure how to teach that in a practical way. A powerful encounter with the love of God always change us.
I have seen radical transformation of behaviour in an instant done by God before. Even for myself, I have experienced many such transformation - which are permanent. Therefore I believe that God can change our beliefs in an instant. And if you want to change something about your beliefs, I ask you first and foremost to pray for that change. Sometimes those changes will come immediate to you by His grace.
However, what I learn in the past few months takes a bit more effort on our part.
You see, our beliefs are like our underlying programming. Unlike computers, we can't just hit the 'delete' button and have them erased. These believes have been reinforced again and again by our habits. As a famous philosopher once said, (i think it's plato), we are what we repeatedly do. That is why change is so hard. We can try and be patient for 1 week but when the 'will' wears thin, the pressures high we revert back to our old habits.
The most important thing to change is to question why the initial programming is there in the first place. Why are you afraid of dogs? Were you bitten by one when you were a kid? The FIRST encounter - where the basic programs are written - are crucial. It's no wonder psychologist always ask us to think back to our childhood.
If you know why you are programmed that way - why you belief what you belief - then the next question is to ask yourself what do you want to be? Where do you want to go?
A recent example for me was that I discovered that I tend to want be above average but when it comes to excellence, I self -sabotage myself. I cannot bring myself to aim for an 'A'. I feel bad about excelling. Everytime when I'm closed to be being 'good', I see myself going down in flames.... Actually this issue has been going for quite awhile and it's reflected when i'm playing on stage or playing game or even trading.
For the longest time, I just couldn't figure it out why this programming was there. I obviously love to be 'dominating' and yet everytime I rise to the top, I have many self-sabotaging habits that will ensure my own going down. Only last week, I remember 2 incidents that may started this belief in me.
The first was me getting scholded for my math score in primary school. I got 99 out of 100 but my best friend got 99.5 . My mom often compared me to him and she scolded me for not being as good. I felt terrible. I felt horrible. I remembered I cried and cried and cried. its 99!!!!!!
The second thing I remember was a child, whenever I was good at something, I would be put on the spot to 'prove it' - which I hated. And sometimes because I was good at something, I was made fun of. Oddly, I cannot remember any examples of this but just a flurry mix of emotions. I can remember once mom asking me play the organ for strangers in my play time and when I didn't do as good critise me. All I remember was, I was being made fun off, compared with and belittled.
There was just no incentive in being good - because it was never good enough. Besides, being good gives me added risk of being made fun off, poked at, laugh at... and a constant pressure to stay on top (so that mom won't scold me further for deproving).
I think it was then I decided early in my age that I shall become always above average. It was safe there. I'm better than most without the pain of being the best :) It was a humbling discovery. I was so afraid of rejection that I stopped myself from being the best that I can be! Imagine that.
So once I know about this, I took captive of all this and submit it to the Lord. I told Him that I want change, help me.
I also thought about what I want to be: a man that is confident in himself - at the best of himself. I shouldn't feel ridiculed if I'm doing the best I can. I shouldn't feel shy either because I am good. I shouldn't feel bad either by comparing. I am what I am - and I do the best that I can.
"I can do ALL things in Christ who strengthens me" "I am like a tree plated on rivers of water that shall bear fruit in its season, its leaves shall not wither and what I do shall prosper" "I am the beloved son of God, of whom He is well pleased with" " I'm the righteousness of the Most High God" I repeat, again and again and again the promises of God.
And each time, when I feel the old programming coming in. I stood firm in the promises of God. I remember his goodness to me - the things he has done and is doing and lastly, I THANK him for changing me.
I do it again and again and again. In other words, I am reprogramming my beliefs. The bible calls it 'transforming ourselves to the image of christ by beholding His image' (somewhere in 1cor) . I keep that new image of me, which is an image of Christ, in my head and I keep focus on it.
This is how I became a better trader as well. I looked into my own beliefs that was stopping me - the underlying programming of why I took my stops out early, why I took my profits out early, why I was chasing, why I hesistate...etc It was a very tough time dealing with myself. And when I found out my erroneous beliefs on the market and on my trading system, I took captive of that and designed a trading regime to help me reprogram that. I do that again and again and again
I wrote out what I feel were correct beliefs on stickies in front of my pc and read them everyday. Where I was- an ugly point A was a long walk to point B where I wanted to be. I beheld point B in my head - the way I would trade, the emotions and kept that image.
Lastly, I thank God for changing me because, in some ways, I knew He was helping me a lot. A little daily nudge goes a long way. And as I work towads point B, I repeated those verses as well - my favourite "whatever I do shall prosper".
Last 6 months has been a great journey and it is the FIRST time in my life Ive experience this change. This wonderful change in me. I AM indeed a new creation!
So in summary, to chnage your beliefs you:-
- find out your underlying beliefs
- find out why they are there
- find out where do you want to go from point A to B?
- Submit the situation to God
- Behold point B in your head
- Meditate on verses day and night to help you. (Meditate in hebrew means utter under your breath)
- Thank Him for changing us!
- Repeat and rejoice!!
